It was a trying weekend.  We often go to the cabin on the weekend only to have to "deal" with a frustrating person.  A person who fully believes she does nothing wrong because and I quote "my home my rules".   I know people do things because they want to help but my children already have two parents... just saying.  Frustration sets in when you have people over talking you as you try to explain things to your two year old; if it is not hard enough already for her to understand.  Then you go home only to get a flat tire on the way so you dont get your children to bed until 10pm.  Poor Calli was emotional and very tired.  Thank goodness for our DVD player and Mickey Mouse Clubhouse to distract her.

I recently watched a video on Facebook that was a woman's message before dying.  She had two young children so it really hit home for me.  Would I be able to stand in front of 600 or so people and be able to say cancer is what God's plans were for me?  The thought of leaving my babies makes my heart hurt (even if it is dying of old age in 60 years)..... so to tie this all in....

I asked my husband if our flat tire was God trying to send us a message.  What type of message?  Maybe that it is time to slow down. Maybe its that we have been on a wrong path.  Maybe its about patience.  Maybe its about relying on someone other than ourselves.  This all came shortly after a "discussion" about the frustrating person and being tired of dealing with them.  And then having a "discussion" about us.  I truly believed the flat tire was a message.

But now what?  Now that I realize it was a message what do I do with it?  I want things to be happier in our lives.  I want our relationship to be healthier.  I want to have a stronger relationship with God.  I also need my husband to want some of the same things.  So we will see where this "road" takes us.

Well it has definitely been interesting trying to raise children and balance a healthy relationship.  I would like to talk about something other than potty training, breast feeding, or how many times I have changed diapers today.  My husband doesnt sleep in the bedroom as he believes that he should be getting a good nights sleep for work and says that I know what he would be like if he did not get enough sleep.  It is frustrating.  I know he needs sleep.... but I would also like to feel like he wants to be there for me too.  He will come and hang out in the bedroom, watch what he wants on the tv and then he says he is going to bed and leaves.  There is no talking.... no interactions... he says that we are together watching tv so he is spending time with me.  Its not about quantity, its about quality!

I dont mean to complain.... but its not like anyone reads this but me.  My house isnt clean but the moment I clean it I have a husband that comes home and makes a mess... a toddler that makes a mess.... and a baby that requires a lot of attention.  I know being a mom means really giving up yourself for your family.... but I still need a part of me to exist.

Baby #2

So it has been way over a year since I have posted anything.  But now that our baby boy is here... it makes life a little more interesting!

Calli's update:
Calli is almost 100% potty trained.  I can not believe how big she has gotten.  She is 26 months (2 years 2 months) and is a bright shining light in my life.  There is nothing like watching her dance and giggle or sing a song and smile.  While she is mischievous (recently dumped a whole tub of flour on the floor and all over herself after having a bath or painting her room and self with a tub of diaper cream)... life would definitely not be interesting without her!
We recently got Calli's blood work done to help find out what she is allergic to.  Instead the doctor discovered that she has an under-active thyroid.  So what does this mean for her?  Well it is the reason for her poop problems and random allergic reactions to food.  It also is a reason for the amount she sleeps or her quick moody reactions.  It is also the reason she is such a little pipsqueak.  We are waiting for an appointment with the pediatrician to see what we need to do next.  I thank God for doctors and their knowledge and that she will be able to catch up once on medications.
Calli loves sleeping in her big girl bed and cuddling with her piglet.  She loves her turtle and octopus that project images of stars and fish and bubble all over her room.  Calli loves anything musical, especially when watching Mickey Mouse Clubhouse or Little Einstein.  She can count with you to 10 and you cant count down when she is in trouble because 5, 4, 3, 2, 1 means BLAST OFF and she will go running.
Calli is in love with her baby brother.  At first she wanted to send him back but now she just wants to help in whatever way she can, even if it means swinging him in his swing or trying to give him a blanket when not needed.  But I can not help but smile when she cuddles right up to him and says "Love you baby brother cade".

All About Cade:
Cade was born on July 4, weighing in at 8lbs even and 21 inches long.  He was born at 8:38 pm after 38 hrs of contractions 2-6 min apart.  My babies sure like it better inside my tummy.  Must be comfy!  He is a pretty great baby so far and even sleeps 4-5 hrs straight at night.  I am so lucky!  Cade looks exactly like me when I was a baby, much to the dismay of his father that just wants a child that looks like him.  Curtis is already dreaming of him being a hockey player and cant wait to get him in skates.  I told Curtis he needs to be old enough to walk first.

Other than that I am happy to be off work for a year, even though I love what I do!  There is nothing like being able to be with both my babies and watching them grow.  I am slowly getting into my own groove with housework, teaching Calli new things, and feeding Cade (who would love to eat ever hour!).  Love my job as a mamma!