The Life of a Leschinski

2011-12-08T13:52:00.000-08:00

The weather is quite cold today compared to the last few weeks so I am doing my best to stay indoors. When I go outdoors, its usually followed by a hot cup of tea or coffee. Although, i really cant complain as the weather has been absolutely beautiful. I was quite upset to find out that we may not actually have a white christmas. I live in the prairies for petes sake!

I havent got to many of the things i planned on baking. I did butter tarts, shortbread, tingalings, cranberry bliss bars and peppermint pinwheels. I am part of a baking exchange that involved 12 people so i though i would wait and see what comes out of that first. The cookies are due on the 14th so its not that far away.

Calli is growing like a weed! She is so happy and cute. She has discovered how to do different things with her tongue so she spends most of her time drooling, making clicking noises, or just plain sticking out her tongue. It makes me smile!

I really got nothing else. I could complain about how much it cost to send cards and packages off today but im sure everyone is feeling the same thing!

The Baker is Back!

2011-11-20T13:46:00.000-08:00

Ok so I made homeade buns and bread today. Dont know why, just really wanted to. And then I ate three buns. They were so amazing and so easy. It was the simplest recipe ever and it actually tasted amazing! Butter and jam. That is all you need in my opinion.

Since my last baking fiasco i also made banana bread that tasted great! This has gotten me in the mood to start my Christmas baking. I have made my list and found the recipes that i think i am going to use.
1. Nanaimo Bars
2. Cranberry Bliss Bars (mock of Starbucks)
3. Shortbread
4. Toffee
5. Butter Tarts
6. Fudge
7. Peppermint Pinwheels
8. Gingerbread Men
9. Lemon Squares
10. Peanut Butter Balls

It is going to take me a while but I am okay with that. I have lots of time when Calli takes great naps. Which she did today, hence making the bread.

Calli survived her shots! She did really well. She had a fever the first night, just a little, but that was it. But she does have some problems with constipation and we ended up having to take her to the doctor. She had some blood in her poop which really sucked. The poor thing was in pain. So now she has medication that has barely been working. We will see what happens. She seems happier so it must be doing something.

Curtis has been officiating hockey a lot these last few weekends. It gets pretty lonely some days. I mean I have my daughter, but there is only so much talking you can do with her. Although she can be pretty entertaining. Her giggles and full on laughs. The big smiles. The babbling. Gotta love being a mom!

2011-11-13T14:57:00.000-08:00

Calli has shots again tomorrow. I am not looking forward to it. It makes me upset knowing that I am going to put my little girl through pain. The look she gives you like she is saying, "Mommy why did you do that to me?" Seriously, breaks your heart!

I cant believe that my baby girl is 6 1/2 months old. This is not fair. She is growing too fast. Now I know there are positives to whatever age she will be. But right now she is so cuddly and smiles a lot. She is not a crabby baby. She brings so much happiness to our lives. I hope it continues as she gets older.

On another note.... am I losing my touch with baking?

This morning I made apple cinnamon muffins. Healthy ones. They were like rubber. Seriously! You could barely get the wrapper off and, if i tried, probably could have bounced them off the floor. Ugh. Someone tell me what I did wrong.

Next... the other day I made mint chocolate mini cupcakes. They sucked. I was disappointed. They ended up more like brownies with wrappers on them. How can people say the recipes are so amazing when they turn out like that?

Could it be the change in weather? Could it be bad baking powder? I dont know... maybe I am truly just losing my touch!

Lattes and laugher

2011-09-14T09:12:00.001-07:00

So it has been a good few days. Had Dana (Curtis' cousin) over for dinner. We havent had anyone over for a while so it was nice to cook for someone else. We all went to Blockbuster as they are closing down all over Canada and have a 25% off sale which we bought 7 movies, three of which were blueray, for $70. Not bad as most of them are pretty new. Other than the Christmas movies I bought. Boy I love Christmas.

Calli got her shots the other day and so has been feverish and a little cranky. But she smiles through it the best she can. I am so blessed by my beautiful little girl. When the going gets tough, just watch her smile and you cant help but do so yourself.

Scrapbooking, so much to do and so little time. But if I actually finish some projects I may feel a sense of accomplishment instead of having that daunting feeling by the piles that I have started but never completed. I mean, what better time than now!

Ok boring post, but i was bored as baby girl is sleeping right now. Should be up soon. Maybe I should shower :)

2011-09-11T18:54:00.000-07:00

Sometimes I feel like the past couple of years have been a bust. Made this move to Lloydminster, left all my friends that I have had for so many years, and was working at a job thast some days I felt so useless at. Having problems with the in-laws has made the "bust" feeling even more exclamated. It is horrible, depressing, and infuriating! Then something happened the other day that made things feel a little worth it.

I ran into an old client of mine. When this individual left, i did not know how they were going to do. Facing huge life challenges which included soon to be a parent (then heard a few days later their spouse miscarried), major mental health issues which included depression, anxiety and severe OCD which was characterized by counting, washing of hands, as well as auditory and visual hallucinations. But I was wrong. They were succeeding. They were deciding to chose a positive life. And were successsful despite all the challenges. And my client said something that made it all worth it.... "You saved my life." Wow. Now of course that was followed up by me telling them how they did it themselved by making the firt choice which was to come to treatment, and then making the choices he needed to in order to stay sober. But still.... it made me feel like I helped save one life. Even with all the frustrating things that have happened since i moved here, just knowing that i made an impact in at least 2 peoples lives (the other one is a whole nother story) has made it worth it.

Then I had to ask myself a huge question.... if someone facing all these HUGE life challenges was succeeding so much, what is my problem? Yes there are a lot of issues here.... but not so challenging as a mental illness and addiction. I really need to get over myself and not sit in a funk because i feel my life sucks besides my beautiful daughter whose unconditional love has changed me beyond measure.

Calli Anna Susan Leschinski

2011-05-19T10:54:00.000-07:00

Calli Anna Susan Leschinski

Born May 3, 2011 at 10:39 pm.

8 lbs 9 1/2 oz.

21 1/2 inches long.

My beautiful baby girl, the little love of my life!

What am I doing?

2011-04-23T14:23:00.000-07:00

I am sitting here on April 23. Does anybody know what April 23 means? Give up? Its my due date and this baby still is not making its long awaited enterance into this world. So what have I been doing isntead?

First of all, I made banana bread. 2 loaves, and brought one to my father in law. I believe that I am single handedly giving him a belly with my banana bread. Curtis buys bananas all the time for his smoothies and half go bad. Thus, banana bread is made at least once every three weeks.

Secondly, I made more diabetic friendly paska for my dad. I made half a batch yesterday just so i could see if it would turn out. It was delicious! Even Curtis loves it. I should have just made it all healthy. But....

I made the regular, unhealthy, totally not good for you paska. A full batch! Curtis' family has only ever had store bought paska (I can hear the groans of all the good germans out there). Store bought is so not good compared to the "real" stuff. So I am going to bring some to Easter dinner tomorrow (as long as this baby is not making its long awaited entrance).

Next.... overnight bun dough. Going to bring those to Easter dinner as long as I have enough flower!

Baby!

2011-04-11T08:03:00.000-07:00

I love this picture! Curtis' cousin did maternity photos for us. I was 32 weeks here. Definitely feeling a lot bigger than that now. Now I am just sitting at home, waiting on mat leave for this baby to come. Due in the next 11 days! Here is hoping I dont have to wait that whole time!

Hockey Widow

2011-02-10T11:19:00.000-08:00

I believe I am a hockey widow! This Saturday Curtis will be gone reffing and linesing from 11am until 12 am and then he has three games on Sunday. I sometimes have a hard time being alone. Especially when we only get a few hours here and there during the week. Me and Curtis do the chores around the house together and then we relax together. I guess its just me again. Our house hasnt had a super good cleaning for a while and the layer of dust on the shelves can only get so thick. Oh well. Maybe I should hire someone. Nah, I just need to get off my pregnant butt and do something.

Speaking of that.... as we speak the baby is kicking the crap out of my innards haha. I can barely sleep at night because when I lay down I cant catch my breath and when I sit up my body thinks its in wake mode. Poor Curtis, probably drove him nuts last night. Oh well.... less than 10 weeks to go.

2011-02-04T17:50:00.000-08:00

Well my husband took me on an awesome weekend away in Edmonton last weekend. We stayed at the Fantasyland Hotel which is in West Edmonton Mall. WE shopped (he spent the most), ate some good food and went to the amazing Dinner Theater at the Mayfield. IT was called the Super Groovy 70s and had amazing music and dancers and there was definitely a lot of laughter. We thought it would be a good idea to get in one last good getaway before baby is born and since I can not fly and Curtis was starting a new job on the Tuesday, Edmonton was the best we could do. All I can say is a jacuzzi tub made it all worth it!

Baby is doing good. Cant believe I am starting my 30th week already. Not too long and the baby will be here. Cant wait to meet this little one that is kicking me and making my ribs hurt :) Curtis thinks its a girl, I think only a boy would kick a girl this hard haha.

Curtis is off reffing a hockey game so I should fold the laundry. Yes, I am domesticated!

Weird

2011-01-20T07:22:00.001-08:00

It is a weird feeling when you pick up the newspaper and see an article about someone you know, especially when they have been charged with second degree murder. I feel sad, angry, and frustrated. Knowing this kid since he was young and now he will be going to jail for a long time. While justice is being served, my heart still goes out to him.

Please keep this young man in your prayers. He was the son/foster child of a family that would take me to church on Sundays and whom I spent a lot of time with. My heart truly aches for this family and what they are going through.

Its A New Year!

2011-01-10T11:49:00.000-08:00

I am not one for making New Years resolutions. This is because most of the time it has to do with my weight somewhat and then when I dont reach my goal I get sad and depressed and eat a bucket of ice cream (not just a small container, a bucket). So this year I didnt want to set a weight goal. And that, of course, is because right now I am 26 weeks pregnant. So what is the point? I am going to eat cookies and ice cream and enjoy it, to a certain extent. I have only gained about 12 lbs in this pregnancy so according to a lot of people, that aint so bad.

So.... for a couple of resolutions..... here we go:
1. Become a more loving wife. For those who know me really well, you know that marriage has been a struggle since day one. I love my husband more than anything, but its my mother in law. And because I struggled with her.... it became a struggle with my husband. Since I can not change my mother in law, i need to change my heart towards my husband. He cant control what she does.... we can only control how much time we spend with them and how we let their attitudes and beliefs affect us. We are allowed to have our own opinions and beliefs!

2. Call the people I love more. Facebook has destroyed (or I have let it destroy) having meaningful conversations on the phone with my loved ones and friends. I miss everyone so much, I need to be willing to call...... even if I have to do all the calling. Sometimes I get frustrated with being the one calling all the time so I just dont.

3. Make more interesting dinners. Whats for dinner hunny? Oh pasta or stirfry or chicken or chili. Those are our main dinners. ITs sad, I know. So I want to make a point of spicing up the food we eat.... and eating more healthy. (Which totally does not correspond with my need to eat cookies and ice cream).

4. Exercise more. Not for the weight loss but for general health. Its hard working all day then making dinner and finding time to exercise. But if it becomes part of a routine, I know it would work better.

5. And 5 goals is good enough. Learn to love myself more. This is no easy task. I am my worst critic! Totally. And part of that is acceptance, which is hard for me. ITs easier to point out my own faults.

So here I go. 2011. So many changes. Baby due in a few months. A husband who loves me and I love so much... making changes to better us instead of worrying about you know who. We can do it, God will help along the way!

To go or not to go.....

2010-07-24T06:30:00.000-07:00

So today Curtis wants to go to the lake. It is a GORGEOUS day outside. I am sure Pixie would love the lake but I am not sure if I want to deal with the MIL. Right now the MIL wants me to apologize for something I have never done. Which I dont feel the need to do just to make her happy. What happens between Curtis and me, happens between us. If she chooses to hold a resntment about something she should not really even know about, that is not my fault.

Pixie.... she is my puppy. We picked her up at the SPCA and she is adorable! She is a 4 month old Silky Terrier X. (Crossed with what, who knows?) She loves me a little too much and often tries to bite my face, but its because she gets so excited. Last night I was lying on the couch watching a movie and she was with Curtis on a recliner. She seriously LAUNCHED herself in the air and right onto my face. Ahhh, the life of having a puppy.

my weekend

2010-07-17T16:11:00.000-07:00

So.... Curtis went to the lake this weekend to be with his family. I stayed home staring at the mess and the piles of clean laundry that I have yet to put away. I LOVE doing laundry, I just hate putting it away. Except for the towels. I have to fold and put away the towels. It is my OCPT thing (obessive compulsive personality traits). They have to be folded the way I like and Curtis does it wrong.

OCPT is a real thing! So for all those out there that have asked themselves if they have OCD (obsessive compulsive disorder), fear not! I talked to a psychiatrist that comes into my work and asked him about it. He said that most people have OCPT so I have nothing to worry about :)

The weather has been interesting here. Yesterday Curtis and I went to the Colonial Days Fair (which was LAME especially after going to something like the PNE). Mainly we went for the mini donuts. Unfortunately, we only got one bag before it started raining like nobodys business. We waited it out for 10 min before we decided we would just go home. Walking through the fair grounds, the water was past our ankles and kept coming. When we got to our street, half of it was flooded! Sure hope the houses down the road didnt get any water damage in their basements. But then, it receeded within 5 minutes after us getting home. I guess here, when it rains, it REALLY pours!

Lucklily the rain has held out for the Thorpe Thunder! It is the baseball tournament this weekend and I have managed to make it to all of the games. We won 2 lost 1. We are playing for 2nd in the tournament now. I really dont understand half the rules about how we are playing for second.... but whatevs. Should be an awesome, nail biting game. I have been taking pictures and will be taking team pictures this afternoon.

Well, I guess I should finish putting away my groceries. I LOVE WALMART! I got a cart full of groceries (which included a lot of fresh fruit, YUM) and it only cost me $68. Where else can you do that in Lloyd? Maybe superstore.... but I hate superstore. That is for a whole nother blog!

2010-07-13T15:24:00.000-07:00

Ok so I am not so good at blogging but half the time I feel like I dont have anything interesting to say. My life really is not that exciting. So far this year all I got is I turned 28 and the other day celebrated 3 years of marriage. I got a new to me vehicle so I upgraded from the 1990 corolla to a 2006 Pontiac Torrent. It is a sweet ride and am totally excited that I have cruise control, air conditioning and heated seats. Also its all wheel drive so I dont have to worry as much in the winter anymore. Woohoo!

We have been have some pretty crazy thunderstorms lately as well as tornado warnings. I find it intriguing. I have seen a tornado before a few years ago but I really do not know how I would feel if it was in my own back yard.

I got asked to be a MC at my cousins wedding in August. Not sure how I feel about it. Well, I said yes. Of course. But I have never done it before. I am probably tag teaming with my cousin Erin but its still one of those things that you never know how you are going to do. I mean I stand up in front of people doing lectures almost every day so it shouldnt be so bad right?

Other than that, I got nothing. Seriously. I miss BC a lot, especially lately. All my friends are having second babies and I was around for their firsts being born. That sucks. I miss my family for sure. And all I ever do is work now.

Oh and now I am not just addicted to Wok Box..... I have now fallen in love with DQs chicken fingers. They actually have the texture of real chicken meat, unlike McDs chicken nuggets.

I love!!!!

2010-01-25T11:04:00.000-08:00

So I have fallen in love with the Wok Box. I don't know if they have them across Canada or what but they are now my favorite place to eat out. What could be better than veggies and chicken with amazing sauce with rice? Well, probably a lot, but eatting out, probably not a lot. I tried the Singapore Cashew the last time I went... it was even great as left-overs. We will definitely be eating out there a lot more often. I had so many left-overs that I am completely full.

This morning was the first time in 8 years (other than for flights etc) that I have gotten up at 6am on purpose. I have chosen this time to work out. Why? Because when I get home from work I really do not want to do anything else. So this is just day one, of hopefully many, mornings that I will get exercise. I am determined not to be lazy.

I took an impromptu trip to BC. It was hard, emotional, and fun all at the same time. It was a great opportunity for me and Curtis to seriously think about our relationship and what we are willing to do to make it healthier. I ate a lot of food, including ice cream sandwhiches for breakfast one morning. It was fantastic. Got home, weighed myself, and I was exactly the same. Now I think the pounds are actually showing up. 2 lbs. Not a ton, but enough to say, no more BC for a while hahaha. Even though I miss it, I always seem to gain weight when I go back.

Well, I should actually go and accomplish something. I am at work and dont have much to do as I am on my lunch break. There is trifle, and man did it ever look yummy. But I shall pass... the biscuits though, I may just give in!

It is 2010

2010-01-01T13:40:00.001-08:00

So the year is now 2010. Where did I expect I would be? Really, I am not quite sure. As a child I probably thought I would be famous in some way or another or just be a mommy. Well I am definitely neither (other than my body having momentary fame in a Thorpe commercial).

Here is what I have accomplished in 2009:
-Bought a house
-Got a job as an addictions counsellor

While those are two really big deals, its hard to focus on them. I think of all the failures and dissappointments. I think about the losses and the broken hearts. I think of all the arguments and issues unresolved. In 2009, there has been a gain of 30lbs (YIKES... can you tell I stress eat?) the purchase of new clothes so pants fit, and dissappointment when the new pants feel tight.

So new years resolutions...... are they pointless? Right now, I feel like they are. I feel that if I make them that it is just something else to dissappoint myself or someone else with. Instead I will make one resolution instead of many. That resolution is to find contenment in whatever form that truly looks like for me. It may mean a lot of changes that are uncomfortable that I dread making for my happiness, and it may mean someone else has to make changes. Either way, I am going to be content and happy.... whether it means heartache, grieving loss, or just plain old stubbornness... I will be happy.

2009-12-16T08:18:00.000-08:00

Ok so its been a while but really there has been nothing exciting to post. My skin is gross because of the dry weather, ugh. -39 the other day and then all of a sudden it warmed up to -19 today. Should be interesting. Im hoping it doesnt cause a bunch of melting and then get cold again. I already feel like i should just ice skate to work.

I am getting more super excited about Sean and Erin visiting soon. Only 2 weeks left. I feel horrible about not picking them up. Maybe I will just do it anyways. I have the day off so it would be worth it. If I leave early in the morning, it should be okay and I can just take it slow. I will look at the weather forcast and see how it goes from there.

I have been having dizzy spells lately. I am going to the chiropractor today so hopefully that will clear it up. Dizzy spells suck. It came shortly after I got the H1N1 shot and the flu shot. So hopefully it is not related to that because I cant take this feeling anymore.

I have nothing left to do for Christmas which is nice, other than a little more baking. Although I am not eating sweats or potatoes right now. I know potatoes sounds weid but they have too much starch. Havent had pasta lately either and if we do its whole wheat. I need to lose weight. So far after 5 days of not eating those things I have already lost 5lbs.... only 50-60 more to go.

Well, thats all for now.

Life!

2009-10-20T11:09:00.000-07:00

Ok so snow... dont even get me started. It comes, it goes, its ice, its puddles, its ice again, it goes, etc etc etc... you get the point. I think the weather definitely has a mind of its own and is doing its best to trick people into doing winterizing for a few days and realizing it may have been done just a few days...weeks... too soon. I am as much confused by the weather as I am sure it is confusing itself.

Nothing new. Seriously. I could tell you the uninterseting facts such as we put new hubcaps on my car so it doesnt look so ghetto. I could tell you we made my car look a little more ghetto by the fact that a few of my rear defoggers werent working so Curtis patched them, and the glass that should not have them as well. I could tell you we got over the toilet storage thing. But really, that is not that interesting.

We have a no-named cat. Kind of reminds me of Breakfast at Tiffanys and the poor cat with no name. So yes, we are that creative and call it Cat or Kitty or Mew or Dumb Cat or Stupid Cat...basically what comes to mind at that moment. She is a pretty calm cat. No complaints really, it barely sheds, she is de-clawed and fixed and has all her shots.... except for her crazy need to have her food bowl full constantly so she can eat too much and puke it up. Gross. So she is on a "diet". Insteand, we have to deal with constant meowing because her bowl is not full. I have yet to decide what the lesser of the two evils are.

Thats it, thats all I got. LAME!

2009-10-06T11:28:00.000-07:00

Wow I havent written anything since July...oopps.

Life is busy as usual. We currently planted grass seed and did some landscaping so hopefully in the spring we will have some nice looking lawn. yeay! Nothing like driving up to a house with dirt all around it. And the dust that we got in our house was unbelievable. I probably could have dusted every day of the week and it would not have mattered.

Work is still going well. We are the beginning of the accrediation process and it is quite interesting. Lots of people milling around asking a lot of questions that I am not sure about. Oh well. I have been here for almost 6 months now and have adapted and settled in. I still feel a little lost some days when dealing with some clients but my confidence is growing a little.

Life is really not interesting at the moment. We are awaiting the snow that is supposed to appear by the 10th of October and I am not sure how I feel about that. It is not that I hate snow, it is just that my car is definitely not prepared, as well as my experience driving in this kind of snow. We will see how it goes. If not, Curtis will have to drive me to work every day.

Well that is it for now. Wish I could give you something interesting, but I cant.

2009-07-01T08:17:00.000-07:00

Have you ever asked the question, wha the heck am I doing? I have asked that question so many times in the past few months.

As you know I have moved to Lloydminster. We bought a house, we have settled in, and now we are back into a regular mundane existance of going to work, eating, and sleeping, and of course, watching movies. But I feel as though I am just existing.

Before I left Abbotsford, a person really important to me challenged me to make the best out of life. Not everything has to be negative, and everything in God's plan happens for a reason. He told me that I was making a good choice and that I have the opportunity to grow in ways I probably haven't for a really long time.......

I listened to his advice. I made those choices and now I am here. I am working as an addictions counsellor. It is a great job. I enjoy most of the people I work with (there are always the bad apples that drive ya nuts). But I am not satisified. I miss Northview. I realized how often I took my job there for granted. I worked with the most amazing man of God I have ever met, worked with a great team of people, but eventually got burnt out. Burnt out because I did not allow myself to set boundaries in my work place, and the boundaries set, crumbled. I did not allow myself to work through the emotions I was feelings, whether in my marriage, with friends, or really just life in general. I was too busy "fixing" everyone else's problems that I was not able to focus on my own. And I sit here now, occassionally, reading the Northview blog and truly missing the wisdom and guidance from pastors who were truly friends, people who truly cared and people who shared your faith. I miss Northview.

I feel I am only existing because I miss my friends as well. Their lives are moving on, I am missing moments in the lives of people I truly love. Jericho is growing up without me, as well as Gabby, Mik, and so many more. I was not able to be there for my best friend when she experienced loss so painful, she cried hard for one of the first times in her life. I am missing Birthdays, milestones, events, or just moments where you know when you feel alone, you can go and play Lego Batman for all hours and eat cupcakes with your favorite person. I miss times with my sister, who growing up, I feel I did not get to know the way I would have liked. These people were a part of my life for 10 years, some even more. I feel like I have walked away from the people I need most in my life.

Yesterday was a particularly lonely day. Thoughts of my Birthday I just had without my best friend, who has been there for almost every Birthday since I was 12. Thoughts of loss and grief experienced in the past couple of weeks. I truly felt alone. There was no one to really talk to about all this. I really wanted to talk, so I picked up the phone and was unable to reach the two people I wanted to talk to. This made the feeling worse. So my husband gets home from work and asks me whats wrong with me (and yes he did put it that way). I said I felt lonely. He replied that I should be your best friend so who else do you need? But really, has he not realized he was not home for one evening last week, then he went on a fishing trip all weekend, and then goes to his families the next day. I really dont feel like I exist in his world. He is back in Lloyd where he has wanted to be. I may go to his family with him, but he leaves and I dont see him for the rest of the night. I am only existing.

There are good days. I am going with someone from work to watch people from my work play slow-pitch. Should be good. It is Canada Day! Time for the fish fry and fireworks. I will chose to be happy, as I try to do every day. For the last year my motto has been to Choose Joy. I still choose joy every morning, but I am still allowed to miss the people I truly love.

I love ya and miss ya. You know who you are!

Lloyd.....

2009-04-05T07:06:00.000-07:00

So its Sunday morning, pretty early. Can't sleep as usual. We are here in Lloyd and I had a job interview. It is one of those interviews that you are not quite sure how it is going to turn out. It seemed to be good but you are not quite sure if the people are awkward or they really like you. I find out Monday or Tuesday. Have I ever mentioned I am impatient and my husband is going nuts because for some reason he has become super financial guy and nags and nags, and nags and nags. He is so worried that I don't have this job and then bugs me about getting a job. Ugh. It drives me nuts but I know he means well.

I got to see my house. It is a nice house, a lot different of a layout then I have ever seen but it is a typical Saskatchewan bi-level. I love my kitchen. As seen in the pics from my last post. Right now we have too many rooms, we really dont know what to do with one of them. We have a spare room, a computer/craft room, our master bedroom, and an empty room. Yeah, dont know what to do with that empty room. Its a nice one upstairs too. My in-laws say it would be great for a nursery although we are not sure we want to have kids any time soon. Too much going on for that.

We went and signed the financial documents to find out that our mortgage is only as much as our current rent which is awesome! Although we have life insurance (which is like a mortgage guard but since we have a line of credit its life insureance) which is a lot of money, and then we have to have house insurance and then we pay for all the bills, but now we will have two incomes so we really dont need to worry.

My mother-in-law has been okay on this visit, although there were a ton of little jabs that I have to just ignore. She has good moments and horribly nosey moments that Curtis finally says something about which is nice. It mainly involves my ability to cook and clean, its not good enough to her. But whatever, I will get over it.

Today is Grandpas 70th so I should go and start getting ready. Going to church first. Honestly I am not that excited about going to this church. Maybe I am spoiled at Northview but it doesnt have great worship, and some of the best speakers I have ever heard. In fact, a lot of the worship leaders at the church here have no talent at all. Its hard to worship for me when people are singing off-key. Lord help me....

Off I go. I really need a shower.

The House Is Ours!

2009-03-25T08:07:00.000-07:00

Ok so these are bad pictures, my husband was too impatient to take good ones. But here are my two I like, the front of the house and the kitchen, pretty much all I care about haha.

Life or something like it

2009-03-04T09:38:00.000-08:00

Ok so Curtis is back from having a short jaunt to Lloydminster and we have 3 different houses which will potentially become ours. I am excited, nervouse, and have to deal with an overly stressed out husband who can become not so pleasant to be around. Although his dad, when back from Phoenix, is officially putting an offer in on our #1 house.

Other than that life is kinda the same, work eat sleep play... less play than work. Although my cousin Erin and myself finished Lego Indiana Jones 100%. Both of us very excited about this accomplishment. Yes, that is sad. We admit it. Over a plate of waffles.

I think I have a problem with my hip, and feel like an old person. I cant skate, because it hurts my right hip. Cant rollerblade, because it hurts my right hip. Cant sleep certain ways, or I wake up with a hurt hip. I AM OLD IN BODY!

2009-02-13T08:30:00.000-08:00

So we think we found the house we want to buy. We will see. If you want to check it out its mls# is 38620 (I think). Its a brand new house and going for the right price. Only downfall is the lack of garage.

Things have been pretty good lately. Except for actually going to the gym. I think its been a month. Oh well. Luckily through work I get half of it paid for. I just need to get my butt there. A personal trainer (and friend of mine) once told me that she has clients that work 50 hrs a week and still make it to the gym so I should have no excuse. I asked if they were single... she said they will be. Haha.

Im still quite nervous about this moving thing. But Pastor Vic continues to give me words of wisdom and encouragement. I will miss him greatly. He has been a great boss, encourager, and really a friend. Although he has never had me to his house. Its cuz I am a dork, I know it.

Anyways, thats all for now. Not much to post. Although I think I may have really injured my baby toe. IT hurts haha.

2009-01-11T09:53:00.000-08:00

1. My nephew Jaxon

2. Foster Baby Krystal- aks Sweet Cheaks!

3. Bonding time with Aunty

4. Stuck in an airport

5. My Crazy Family

2008-11-18T13:13:00.000-08:00

So I set up my Christmas tree on Sunday (I will post pictures of that later). I enjoyed every minute of it. My husband actually volunteered to put Christmas music on so it would be more festive for me. The favorite part of all this is not only spending time with my husband but also opening one special box. In this box is tacky little ornaments. But they are special. 95% o them were made by Curtis' Great-Grandma. They consist of many crocheted items dipped in wax to make them firm. Little angels, fans, teddy bears glued to washboards, you get the picture. But without theses decorations, it would not be OUR tree. And I love OUR tree.... tackiness and all.

I have been to curves a total of 5 times since I got the membership. How sad is that. I once again make excuses for myself that I just dont have the time. Yet months ago I was challenged by a personal trainer friend of mine that she knows people who work 50 hrs a week and still have time for the gym so I have no excuse. So rewind, I dont go to the gym because I am lazy! But I have been eating better and am getting more inspired to go to the gym as I had to do my belt up one notch skinnier which is always encouraging.

I am super excited for my 3rd Annual Christmas Extravaganze is a party that I traditionally now do for all of my friends since I do not see a lot of them through the Christmas season. THis year we are doing a "bring an appetizer/dessert and a christmas item to exchange" thing. I am excited. Lot less work and a lot less clean up for me and Curtis.

Anyways, other than that nothing else is new. We are dog-sitting right now. Some moments it makes Curtis was a dog, others it does not. I want a dog. PPPLLLEEASSSE Hunny.... his reply... silence.

2008-11-04T08:25:00.000-08:00

So... I have been going to Curves for the last week. ITs alright. Not exactly what I would chose for a gym due to the lack of options but its definitely a routine kind of place. A lot of ladies need to learn what a sports bra is. There is nothing like seeing an oversized woman's breasts flopping around everywhere. It is somewhat revolting actually. I have been going with my friend Patti who lives upstairs. She is awesome to go with. Although the 6:30 am thing has a little to be desired.

Been looking at houses online. Kinda fun. Find a few I like and then they sell or get taken off the market. It is kind of sad when that happens. My dream, and I dont care what anything else really looks like, is to have a nice kitchen with an island. Always wanted an island in my kitchen. The place we are renting now would have been perfect for one. I want my kitchen bright and sunny.
I guess I do care what other things look like as well. I am lying. I want a nice sized bedroom where all our stuff can fit in the bedroom and not have to put something in the living room. Im tired of being squished and always bruising my leg on the footboard of our bed. UGH!
AndI would like to have somewhat of a back yard. One where one day when we have kids they can run and play all in the safety and comfort of their back yard.
I want a living room that is cozy and inviting. The kind of place where you just want to snuggle under a blanket by the fire with a hot chocolate.
Then Curtis wants his "media" room. Basically a place where he can blare music without anyone getting mad... what he doesnt realize is I probably still would be made if I came home to a house with blaring music. Can't stand it.

Anyways, I really did not have much to say. I live a pretty boring repetative life.... work... sleep... eat....work....sleep....eat.....pull my hair out.... work.... sleep...zzzzzzz

2008-10-27T07:37:00.000-07:00

Could today be the day?
For what? You may ask.

I just feel like today could be a transitioning kind of day. The one that makes you feel more positive and more joyful and happy to be where you are at but happy to make changes.

I need to make a massive decision about moving.... it would not be until May or June but I do have to make the decision. I wrote about it before and am completely unsure as to what I should do. Could I be a school counsellor? Would it be worth moving to cold winters for? So I start praying..... but do it selfishly. God, this is what I want... not God what do you want. So I begin again. And now I wait for answers.

It was a tough week last week. A friend passed away from bacterial meningitis. Something I can not understand that would take a young life at the age of 22. So much going for her. Yet God chose her. Not me, not a 100 year old woman, her. But as someone wise said "When we can't understand God's hand, we trust His heart." Later on in the week we find out Curtis' cousin Joseph has a brain tumour the size of an orange. Found it out after he got in an accident and thought he was fine but he got taken to the hospital where they found it. PRAY! He is a 23 year old, who does not know the Lord. Greater things are yet to come....

So... each morning CHOOSE JOY. You never know what might come of it.

2008-09-29T10:47:00.000-07:00

Ok so today my pet peeve is dental hygenists. I went to the dentist today to get my bi-yearly cleaning and i hear "your gums are bleeding do you floss" and I really feel like replying "my gums are bleeding because you just stabbed them really hard with a sharp pointy thing.... let me try it on you and see if your gums would bleed".
So I do try to floss as much as possible but here is the problem.... I have a very little mouth. The dentist knows me as the girl with the little mouth and makes fun of me for it (I know him on a personal level because of church). Sticking my hands in my mouth and then trying to move floss between my tightly placed together teeth can be painful. So the hygenist gave me new floss to try out. We will see how that goes.

Other than that, Curtis and me are doing great. Thinking about a possible move more eastwardly to be near his family which is always on his mind. Me, maybe not so much. But I am doing my best to be a good, respectful, and obedient wife which does not come naturally to me. So I have found a few houses I would like but not sure. Seems like a large commitment to make... to just go and buy a house. I guess I need a job there first.

I am in a wedding on the 11th of October and not feeling too good about it. My goal was to lose 30 lbs before the wedding. Lost 5. Just 5. I am too much of a stress eater. I asked my cousin how she got so thin for her wedding, helps being on your feet but have stomach problems continuously and that helps. I secretly wish for stomach problems so I dont have the urge to eat so much. But I am doing my best to do it the healthy way and the weather has not been cooperating that much to go out for a walk.

On another note....
My friend had her baby. My friend from Kamloops... had her a month ago. Beautiful little girl. Unfortunately there were complications like infection on the c-section area and then a cyst and they she got pneumonia from it being spread in the hospital or something like that. She is still on IV periodically to help get rid of the infection that spread into other areas. So one month later she can bond with her daughter.... and move into a new house all in the same week.

On yet another note.... fall is here. My favorite season! I love sweaters and blankets and beautifully colored leaves. Can't wait to go on more walks in the evenings... I really hope it doesnt rain for a while.

Thas all for now. Will post more soon. I have been such a bad poster.

2008-07-21T13:33:00.000-07:00

Introducing Jericho Avery MacDonald

Born 12:47 am July 21, 2008

Weighing in at 6lbs 13 oz.

21 inches long

Born to Sheldon and Marina MacDonald

And proud honorary Aunty Christy who just cant get enough of him already!

2008-07-10T12:05:00.001-07:00

I have friends who have lost the person they were meant to love supposedly for the rest of their life. Yet, I still am able to sit beside the love of my life, care for him, love him, experience life with him. Others have had that taken away.

I have never really got why God chooses certain paths for some that are so emotionally screwed up and yet my life has been pretty good. The only person I have ever lost in my life is my grandfather and he was well somewhat old. But I have never had to exerience too much of a personal loss. I have had friends pass away and one commit suicide but most of them had been casual friends, not in my close "friends circle".

At the church I work at, I just organized a funeral last saturday for a woman in her 60s who struggled with depression all of her life, and eventually took her own life. To see the family, so overcome with grief, was overwhelming for me. Some people cried silent tears but one daughter sobbed and wailed... like you usually see in the movies. But this time it was not an act, it was someone's true grief for the loss of their mother.

I am at a loss for words to say to people who experience such grief. I get that knot that feels like its rising up your chest and eventually will be that lump in your throat..... all I can say is "im praying for you". I feel like such a loser. Such a typical christian thing to say. That is not really what they want to hear. They dont want to hear "im sorry for your loss" when really I have no idea who these people are or were. Am I really sorry, well I feel bad for them but I think sorry is the wrong word.

So what do you say that doesnt sound stupid to the people experiences this loss? I think I just have to come to grips with the "im praying for you" thing because there is really nothing else I can say. I will not, most likely, be the person that impacts them in a positive way because I have to ask all the annoying quetions for funeral/memorial details.

My heart aches just thinking about the potential loss I could experience. I look above my computer screen at work and see wedding photos will a lot of the people I truly care about and dont think I could handle losing.... my family, my best friends, the love of my life. I sometimes have nightmares about my husband dying and the funeral following, maybe its because I have arranged 6 funerals in 2 months at my job. But I wake up absolutely frightened. I remember one night I must have only been sleeping for an hour and woke up and my husband wasnt there and I freaked. Only to realize he would not be home from work yet. Loss is something I do not want to experience but I know one day I will, not necessarily my husband but someone. What will I want people to say to me then? Will I really care what they say? Will I remember what they say? Will I even listen?

Oops

2008-07-08T13:42:00.001-07:00

So totally deleted my last post by accident after I was half through writing it.

1. Survived vaca with the mother in law with only personally inflicted injuries caused by mis-stepping off a slippery dock. Will post pictures of that injury later.

2. Brother in law graduated making me feel old that i graduated 8 years ago already.

Here is a pic of the fam. (Dad, me looking like a complete dork, Curtis, Deryk, Jesse, Jessica (Jesse's girlfirend) Curtis' mom)

3. Sister is out for a visit right now. She recently received a position at my church as an administrative assistance to the pastor of prayer and discipleship. It will be cool to have her around as not many family members are near by that actually visit.

4. Tonight Kim and me are going to see Spamalot. I am pretty excited about that. I like plays especially ones that can potentially make you laugh like crazy. Yeay!

5. One of my core group girls got baptised on Sunday. I am so proud of her! Grown from a girl to a beautiful young lady in Christ. Very cool!

6. I will be honest about one thing, I have a friend. I dont see her as she lives far away. She is frustrating me. She lives a "secular" style life with going to the bars and getting drunk, sleeping with men she barely knows, and other things. She turns around about every 3 months and says how she has decided to turn her life around and makes up a sob story about what people have done to her (not what she has done to herself like it really is) and how she is going to use that for God and reach young woman who may be going through the same things she did. While that is an awesome idea, I am tired of reading about this stuff and her not following through. She still continues to go to bars... does that really make her situation that much better to be a role model, I dont think so.

7. I have two friends who are pregnant, one who is ready to pop at any minute. She has to be one of the most beautiful pregnant woman I have ever seen! So gorgeous! Here are a few pics from maternity photos they got done.

Thats about it for my life right now... fun fun

Its Almost My Birthday

2008-06-15T10:49:00.000-07:00

Tomorrow I turn 26. Pretty crazy, eh? I have opened almost all of my presents already as my husband can't be patient enough and kept on asking me if he can give me my present. So I finally said yes, mainly because he was sad when his dad and brother and cousin left this morning.

He got me a silved ipod nano. I have wanted one for a while as I like having music when I go to the gym. Althought, I have not been to the gym in a while with all the funerals that I have been arranging. I am pretty happy about my gift.

Mom and Dad and sister got me a bread maker which i am excited about especially since the cost of bread is going up and up. I like the idea of fresh bread in the morning. Yummy!

I am having some friends over tonight for a bbq as I have to work tomorrow and all that. Should be fun. Just really casual eating food and hanging out. Maybe I will make myself a cake :)

2008-06-10T21:54:00.000-07:00

Random picture of me and a cute little girl named Jazira. She was an orphan in Africa and told Marina a story about how she dropped the water she was carrying on her head once because a giraffe ran by her. She hides chicken bones because she is scared that one day she wont have anything to eat. I have a big heart for this girl!

So tonight was our last night of youth for the summer. Sometimes its hard saying goodbye to the kids and they will be going off to high school so you have to leave them in God's hands as they do not have Christian parents and are already not hanging out with the best crowd. There is one girl in particular that I know I will pray for constantly. I just hope she gets the emotional help she needs before she makes a lot of massive mistakes.... which unfortunately I can see her making.

Curtis' dad gets here on Thursday. I am a little nervous but I am really hoping that it will be a good opportunity to strengthen my relationship with him so it makes it a little easier when we go there in two weeks. We will see. I am not really expecting him to invest time in me but I have to prepare myself emotionally with that.

So I will have Tuesday nights free for the next little while which will give Curtis and me a good break. Maybe we will make it movie night or something, i dont know :)

I have one more funeral on Tuesday and it is going to be a HUGE one. I am so stressed out that I feel like puking all the time. They are expecting MANY people. They actually announced the location of the funeral now on CTV/Global news. Kinda scares me. So pray for strength, patience, and that everything would run smoothly. I am truly frightened!

2008-06-07T12:49:00.000-07:00

ME and Curtis decided to take a random trip to Canadian Tire the other day to see if they have our chairs from last year in stock for the summer. NO SUCH LUCK! There will be no matching chairs at our outdoor table.... oh well.
Randomly he wants to see how much he weighs so he sets on an adventure to find a weight scale. So we did and then he tells me to weigh myself. Not such a good idea. Only to find I had gained weight. What is the point of eating healthy if it doesnt help. Gym, you suck! You are by my work and well you do not motivate me.
Ordered a dress for Erin's wedding only to have to order a size 18. The lady was quite amused at my rantings about how i hate bridal stores as they make you feel fatter than you really are. She said they are about 4-6 sizes smaller than you would actually wear in a normal store. With that I sit happily at my size 14 trying to cram myself into a size 10 sample. Who only carries small samples? Oh well. It is order, and going to be altered... hopefully for the better.

2008-05-28T13:48:00.000-07:00

Wow, what a crazy week it has been so far! I have put in 8 hrs overtime in two days and we still have a lot to do. A lady passed away, did her husbands funeral about 3 months ago. So that keeps me busy. Then our color printer broke down so I have to rush it to the printers only to have one of the Pastors say call the family and see if they have a color printer. How friggin insensitive! Ok then I have to do two evenings of membership interviews which just is going to make me go over the edge.

Although I did get pulled into a meeting today to say they are revamping a whole bunch of things and some things MAY get taken off my plate. But it would take a while to get there. So I am sorta excited. WE will see what happens.

Curtis got back on Monday from going to Edmonton YC. It is good to have him home. Seems weird since I was happy he would be gone for 4 days but it was kinda lonely without him. I know, I do not make much sense.

So I went to a wedding this weekend of my friend Juanita. I am so happy for her. If you have my facebook you can see pictures. Anyways, got asked three times if I was pregnant. Time to really start dieting.

UGH!

Baby and More

2008-05-15T12:11:00.001-07:00

So the baby was born on May 4th. Beautiful baby girl Gabriella Katrina 9lbs 9oz. The health nurse came and visited the other day and Gabriella had lost too much weight so they put Patti on meds to hopefully bring her milk in stronger. Poor little girl. Their life saving purchase, a baby swing!!

She is a cute little thing. I look like crap in the pic though. Thats after hours of spending time driving back and forth to visit Patti to keep her company and take care of their dog.

Speaking of all that, I now have subs for my car! In appreciation for all the Curtis and me did for them they gave me the subs from the back of Jim's car. Worth over $600! All I had to do was purchase a wiring kit for my car which was only $70. So now I will have some bass in my car! Went from nothing at all to hopefully awesome. Curtis is doing the install today!

Speaking of Curtis, his uncle Ronnie passed away yesterday after a very courageous battle with cancer. They were putting him into a coma so he would not have to suffer from the pain and it killed him. It is a blessing disguise. No longer in pain.

The funeral is held tomorrow so none of us can go. Family giving us a little grief but with work and everything else it just is not working. My friend Karen from the Queen Charlottes will be here on Friday and I only get to see her about once a year so I am looking forward to that. I have to work on Saturday all day but seeing Karen on Friday makes it worth it. Should be a fun evening of shopping and dinner and of course lots of laughter.

Curtis is still enjoying all of his internship work.

I still like work.

The End.

WOW BABY

2008-05-04T09:52:00.000-07:00

Ok so my friend Patti has now been induced for the fourth time and given oxytocin(?). Poor girl is still only dialated to 1cm. How long with it take for Bjerke to give her a c-section? I guess we will find out today. 15 days overdue and counting! Stubborn little thing, I think.

My friends dad made it ok out of surgery but will have a lot of re-cooperating to do . Became a Christian through it all which was pretty darn awesome!

Today Curtis will start his ministry at the prison which is pretty exciting. The man he will be working under says he believes this will lead to great things for Curtis which is super awesome. Curtis has a hard time believing in himself and what he can do, especially with the one almost blind eye which limits his possibilities out there.

So today also means it starts my 4 day streak without seeing him! Oh dear. What will I do with my time? Cant go shopping because I already bought shorts. Maybe I will go and visit someone. Who knows.... any creative ideas for those that are poor?

The Summer Adventures Begin

2008-04-30T14:09:00.000-07:00

Current Weather: Gloomy
Personal Mood: ARRRRRGHHHHH

Ok so I am not going anywhere for a while..... in fact not till the end of June. But shorts shopping has begun! I HATE SHORT SHOPPING! I am not a hussy and want short booty shorts! I want nice knee length shorts that look pretty that can fit my butt and thighs into them! Not these tiny legged big wasted things that make me look like a pear or I dont know some oddly shaped fruit.

MY NEW BEST FRIEND:
THe Medona? line from Target. Cute shorts. Nice fit.... and far from being booty shorts. I am so excited about this purchase. I am not excited about being the size they were but hey I will do anything for something that is cheap that fits properly. I got a pair of shorts that are pink brown and blue plaid and are so cute and then a pair of gray capris. So cute!

So tonight, I will go on another shopping adventure to find more shorts.

Prayer Items:
-My people from upstairs, she is 10 days overdue with their first child. Getting uncomfy so pray for a quick and safe delivery soon!
-A friend of mine's father broke his kneck and is getting emergency surgery tonight. Drs are surprised that he is not either a quadrapelegic right now or even dead.

Have a good week!

Another Day

2008-04-23T10:45:00.000-07:00

Im sitting here bored at work trying to find something to do. So I thought, why not do another blog about nothing. Since the last one was pretty much nothing.

Curtis finished his last exam this year just now. He just walked in the door at home and I called him. He seemed somewhat excited but at the same time knowing he has to do an internship this summer, he feels as though school won't end. I just encourage him and say that everything will be okay and he will get some time to relax and have fun. After all, we are taking two weeks vacation in August.

Tomorrow is the dreaded Grad Banquet where I have to dress up and do my hair. Depressing fact #1 there is only one dress in my closet that still fits me..... depressing fact #2 the dress that fits is nice but there is this seeminly little bulge called my fatty hips... depressing fact #3 spanx cost a lot of money.... depressing fact #4 I have to do my hair and have no idea what to do with this weird length that I am at..... depressing fact #5 my feet are too swollen to wear nice shoes.
Exciting fact #1 I still fit into one dress in my closet! Exiting fact #2 My best friend is graduating from college! Exciting fact #3 I get to buy some new MAC! Exiting fact #4 New shoes...enough said!

Just for me

2008-04-21T09:59:00.000-07:00

Do you ever wonder why everyone in the world seems to be getting more and more negative as time goes by? I have found myself trapped in a world of negativity where everything seems to go wrong. Every little problem is monumental and devastating. Why? Don't know.

So why write a blog if I am so negative? Because I am hoping it will return some joy to my life so I can vent, talk to myself, and lose weight?

Lose weight? Well I don't know. I am going to try self motivation.

WORKING OUT: Day 1
Hasn't happened yet but I am sure it will tomorrow :)